James has been happy to keep my out of our medical plan summary, I’m sure. But today I stupidly logged in. After looking, I am physically, emotionally, and now financially drained.
It makes me sick to see the price of life through a medical insurance company and a hospital. Don’t get me wrong, I will pay every penny for the precious few hours with Willow and that wonderful week with Hazel. I would do it over a thousand times as well.
The one that hit me the hardest was the several hundred dollar charge for:
Newborn Roark patient discharge
Like we just got the ok to take her home! The doctor’s cleared her to leave. Only, it wasn’t in my arms. It was the arms of the funeral director, David.
I understand that the doctors, nurses, and other staff need to be paid. They did all they could to save our little girls, but that doesn’t make it feel any less like a kick to the stomach. And we haven’t even received the delivery bill or my 3 week hospital stay.
I love you so much, girls, and I would pay anything to have you back right now. It is just hard to see these when I have empty arms.