Sometimes I get overwhelmed with the feeling that I have nothing to show for my life but debt, failure, sadness, and dead children.


8 thoughts on “Life

  1. I am so sorry for your loss. It is horrible. Even though your child died – you will find some meaning to go on. There is no failure with that – but definitely sadness. I lost a child, too. Hang on to hope. One day you will feel better. Writing is very healing. I healed my pain with writing and song lyrics.

    • Thank you. Some days I am fine. Others I feel buried in grief. I fin if I don’t write exactly what I feel. It just keeps building up, and the grief overwhelms. Writing truly is a release.

      • I didn’t write about my grief in depth until 18 years after. And that was when I healed. I do believe in healing. It isn’t “time heals.” It’s about seeing grief as a journey. My soul was amputated with scars and no one sees it. It changes you forever, but there can be a new life found somewhere along the way. I wish you comfort.

      • Thank you, I just can’t fathom years after At this point. My view of time completely changed when my twins died. I’m a societal anomaly, I’m a mother with no children. Even the thought of getting pregnant again scares the life out of me, but the thought of never getting pregnant again does the same. It’s all just so confusing, but it helps seeing someone farther along on their grief journey still making it. Even if it is still day to day.

      • It is minute to minute sometimes at the beginning. Fear is one of the hardest things, a huge inhibitor in life. When people told me “time heals,” all I could think of was “time is torture!” I like to help others with grief and consider myself to be a window into farther along in the grief journey. I have a huge blog ( – but I’ve organized my writing about grief. I am filled with optimism! But music and writing really helped me to heal. You’ve already begun writing, so I am very hopeful for you to feel clarity and healing. There is no way around the anguish, though. My heart breaks for you.

      • I just went to your blog, you are such and AMAZING artist! How inspiring! I have tried to use art to overcome my grief, but wow. Nothing, even minuscule in talent, close to that!

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