May have Triggers/MENTS
Gentle reminder: Fostering isn’t for everyone. Adoption isn’t for everyone. Infertility treatments aren’t for everyone. Children aren’t for everyone.
Each process is very personal and not entered lightly. Some do a combination of the choices, or choose to not have children. Some have no choice.
The matter is, that this is their choice. Please don’t judge anyone or give advice on how they should proceed unless you are asked for it.
For us, IVF was cheaper than adoption. We weren’t mentally prepared for Fostering. We wanted to keep the baby no matter what. We’ve been told by many the main goal of fostering is reunification with the biological family. If that isn’t possible, then adoption becomes an option. Reunification with the biological family wasn’t our goal at the time, so fostering wasn’t for us at that point.
Adoption is out of our means entirely. Foster to Adopt is still in our sights and we have discussed it greatly for the future. But that is OUR decision.
I am making this public so there is no confusion. Not everyone is comfortable with making their personal life public. I’ve witnessed some very nasty things said about infertility treatments when ‘there are so many that need homes.’ Unless you have been there, you don’t understand the process. It’s not like going to the grocery store and picking out a ripe melon. Google research doesn’t count either.
However you decide to live your life, is the right way for you. Period. Not everyone else.
Family is family no matter how it happens. Whether it is through fostering, adoption, foster to adopt, infertility treatments, a one night stand, an ‘accident’, giving the gift of a child to another, just you and your partner, only children in heaven, or just you and your pets. Family is defined by your heart.